


Caring For Your Beard

by Ann_Drist



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Cap's beard, F/F, Farce, Flash Fiction, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, Satire, Valkyrie will take good care of Cap's beard, flash fiction slash fiction, hair and skin care
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 19:09:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13060314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ann_Drist/pseuds/Ann_Drist
Summary: Thor and Steve have beards. Steve wants tips from Thor about how to take good care of it. Sharon has strong opinions about Steve taking very good care of his beard, for some reason.





	Caring For Your Beard

Steve and Thor stood face-to-face, close enough that their breath mingled. They stared at one another unblinkingly, each cupping the other man’s jaw. Their hands stroked gently, fingers curving around their lush beards. 

Steve’s lips parted. He looked up through lowered lashes and asked with a breathy whisper, “How do you get yours so soft?” 

Thor grinned. “A paste of crushed dragon scales. Put it on overnight, wash it off in the morning. Something about the protein keeps hair strong but not—” he tugged at the whiskers on Steve’s chin— “coarse.” 

Steve laughed, embarrassed. “I don’t know about dragons. I was thinking about getting something from L’Occitane.”

“Is that a planet?”

“No! It’s a store. I need to start taking better care of my beard.” 

A voice drifted into the room. “Well if you’d buy me something nice every once in a while—” Sharon stopped in the middle of the doorway and blinked at Thor. “Oh. You’re not Bucky.” 

“Uh…” Thor’s gaze shifted from Sharon to Steve.

“Uh.” Steve’s face was flushed. He trained his eyes on the ceiling.

“Uh—” Sharon pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. 

Awkward silence saturated the room until another voice drifted in. 

“Hi.” 

They all turned to the open doorway. 

Valkyrie was leaning against the frame, smiling winningly and lazily taking in the view of Sharon Carter from head to toe. 

Sharon flushed and tucked her hair behind her ear. “Hi.” 

 

 

The next day at breakfast, Thor looked closely at his companions. Steve’s cheeks were flushing pink over the top of his dark facial hair. He was awkwardly avoiding everyone’s gaze. Bucky had beard burn underneath his stubble and down his neck. He was either unaware of it or completely unashamed. Sharon looked happy, relaxed, and exhausted. Valkyrie looked all of those things plus smug. Thor made a mental note to high-five her later.

Loki sat down next to him. “What’s with everyone this morning?” 

“Oh, everyone’s getting laid except me.” 

“Ah. Nothing out of the ordinary then.” 

Thor pressed his lips together. His shoulders shook with laughter. “Curse you.” He looked around the table again at his happy comrades. “Yes, nothing out of the ordinary.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Thor planning to high-five Valkyrie later is what allyship looks like.
> 
> Don’t yell at me in the comments—I tagged everything clearly, from the satire and farce to what pairings to expect. Don't like don't read. No flames plz.
> 
> If anybody writes a fic about Thor, Steve, Bucky, Sam, and T'Challa having a guy's night in and doing deep conditioning treatments for their hair and faces I would honestly love to read about it. (Bonus points if Thor braids Bucky's hair because he kinda misses having long hair himself.)


End file.
